“Remember when…”

“Damn straight I do, you cheeky pig. I can’t believe you’d do something like that. In public, no less.”

“What are…”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about. Paris, Iowa. ’07.”

” Why would I…”

“I don’t know why you want to bring it up. Reliving past glories, no doubt.”

“Would you please let me…”

“Explain? As if you c-“

Finish a sentence!

“No need to yell.”

“I’ll be the judge of that.  Now first off, that goat in Paris was asking for it.  Everyone said so.  Should have never crossed that bridge.”

“I beat he agrees now, poor duck.”

“Goat.”

“Same thing.”

“Not in Paris, Iowa.”

“Perhaps.”

“Never mind all that.  What’s up with…”

“Me finishing your sentences?  I just thought I’d save time by using my telepathic powers.”

“Your.  What.”

“Telepathic powers.  Remember when that lightning bolt hit me last week?  Ever since then I’ve been able to read minds.  Dashed nuisance, but what are you going to do?”

“You can’t rea…”

“Read minds?  You were going to say that, right?”

“…Yes.”

“See?  What can I tell you?  My gift, my curse, and all that rot.”

“Deep breath.  No need to throttle… yet.”

“Such a temper.  You really need to see a-“

“It’s impossible for you to get mind reading abilities from…”

“A lightning bolt?”

“That particular lightning bolt.”

“Oh, and why not, smarty pants?  Go on.  Lay your closed minded scepticism on me.  I’ve got an answer for everything.”

“You weren’t struck by lightning last week.”

“Of course I was.”

“No you weren’t.”

“And how, pray, do you know this?”

“Because I was the one  struck by lightning.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“What happened to me, then?”

“Passed out drunk.”

“Ah.”

“Had to take myself to the hospital.  After putting myself out, needless to say.”

“Er.”

“Three days there, too.”

“That would… ah… explain a lot.”

“Alone.”

“Except for doctors and nurses.”

“Not after the first day, no.  But now’s not the time for that.”

“Right.  Um.  Any telepathic powers?”

“Only one.”

“Really?  What is it?  Tell me tellmetellmetellme!”

“I can kill with a thought.”

“Whoa!  Show me showmeshowmeshowme!”

“Don’t tempt me.”

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